In her car heading west
Will and Harper is a Netflix documentary about Will Ferrell and Harper Steele on a road trip from New York to Califoria. Will, a comedian, and Harper, a TV writer, met when they both went to work on Saturday Night Live, back in the day, and have been good friends since.
Will had always known Harper as a man named Andrew. Then he got an email explaining that Andrew had transitioned to a woman named Harper. Harper's email expressed concern that Will would accept her and still be her friend. Will not only chose to accept her and be her friend but suggested a road trip. I think to better understand this person who had been his very close friend for more than 30 years, whom he now discovered he had not known as trully as he thought.
Will suggested a road trip across America to places Harper had gone as a man named Andrew. Now she would experience America as herself.
Their first stop is breakfast with Harper's daughters. Their primary concern about the trip is for Harper's safety. As I watched the girls' obvious worry, I didn't really understand why they would be afraid for her. I was thinking nobody would know she was trans unless she said.
Admittedly she was not very feminine. She walked like a man, albeit in heels. She starts the film always wearing dresses even if pants would have been more appropriate. And she holds her beer like a man. But she looks like a woman. Maybe not a Hugh Hefner style woman, but certainly like many 60-year-old women.
Then I think about it.
Those daughters are right to be afraid for her because Harper is now a woman. She doesn't yet know how to be a woman. Apparently she has a history of going into shady places -- dive bars and such -- wherever she wants. But she's always gone into them as a man named Andrew. As long as a man watches his mouth and doesn't come on to or insult some guy's woman, he'll pretty much be safe in even the worst of bars. However, there are places that are not safe for a woman -- especially, if she seems insecure at all. And Harper is insecure for all kinds of reasons. She's just learning who she is as a person in this new self. She's just learning how to be a woman.
Speaking of dive bars, Harper goes into a bar in the small, rural town of Meeker, Oklahoma. I won't say how that goes, but I will say it was not unlike what I think would have happened in my brother's favorite neighborhood bar in Oyster Creek, Texas.
As the documentary goes on, Harper seems to become more comfortable being a woman and dresses in pants and flats and even a swim suit.
I know, better late than never. But something I want to say, as an old woman myself -- I'm sorry that she transitioned so late in life. She missed the times she could have been the "Barbie" woman. Those times have their own traumas, but they also have their "Princess" moments when she and all the world would have seen her as movie-star glamorous.
