This is my Dad.
Yesterday
was his ninetieth birthday. He was born in Oklahoma County in the State of
Oklahoma on May 30, 1925, Decoration Day.
Decoration
Day had become a traditional holiday in the United States to commemorate the war
dead following the Civil War which ended in 1865. The name gradually changed to Memorial Day, not
most commonly used until after World War II. It wasn’t officially called Memorial
Day until 1967.
Daddy
was born at home. He weighed just over ten pounds. His mother, Emma Mae Jarvis
Weber, was a tiny little thing, barely five feet tall and not much more than
100 pounds.
His
father, Lawrence Leland Weber, farmed with mules and took pride in his teams
and his saddle horses. If he hadn’t already, and Daddy can’t be sure he hadn’t,
he soon acquired a Model T Ford.
Daddy’s
sister, Leland Mae was a toddler.
And
Daddy was duly named Lawrence Alvin, making his initials LAW. Grandma felt that
having initials that spelled something would be good luck.
Speaking
of luck, his astrological sign was Gemini which holds that he’s supposed to be energetic, clever, imaginative,
witty, and adaptable – all of which he is, plus courteous and
kind. I’ve never observed him to have any of the negative characteristics Gemini
are supposed to have.
Chinese astrology says that Daddy was born in the year of the Ox.
People born under this sign are said to be hardworking, discreet, modest,
industrious, charitable, loyal, punctual, philosophical, patient, and
good-hearted individuals with high moral standards. All true of my Daddy.
In
the real world that Saturday, the moon was in its first quarter. The high
temperature that day was 87o, the low was 68o, and no precipitation.
The Stock Market was closed for the holiday, but ended the day before at
$129.95. That’s very low by today’s standard, but it was robust for then and on
the rise. More importantly to Daddy’s family was the price of cotton – $19.62 per hundred weight. 1925 would be a good year for cotton producers.
There
would be two more sisters, Virginia Ellen, and Thelma Grace.
Daddy
grew up during the Great Depression and the Dust Bowl. His experiences were as
a white child in a segregated community where most of the white people were
related to him or related to someone who was related to him. His circle of
friends came ready-made from birth. They were kith and kin.
In
1943, in the midst of World War II, he left school to join the Navy. He became a Seabee and served in the Pacific Theater of War.
As with
many young men of that time, it was his first experience away from home. Those
young men were from all parts of the country, big cities, small towns, and the
countryside. They were all there – young men from the Northeast, the Upper
Midwest, the Deep South, the Great American Plains, and the West Coast.
They
were farmers’ sons and factory laborers’ sons, longshoremen’s sons, doctors’ sons,
bakers’ sons, and preachers’ sons. Some were single. Some were married with sons
and daughters of their own. Each had joined the navy for his own reason, but
all were there for the duration – until the war ended, whenever that would be.
And again, Daddy’s circle of friends was ready-made.
When
he came back into civilian life, he returned to Oklahoma County and his rural
roots. He married a local girl, Peggy Hrdlicka. His Aunt June who was married
to Momma’s Uncle Ray complained that she hadn’t gotten any new relatives out of
the marriage. It was in fact the third of four marriages between Daddy’s family
and Momma’s family.
Daddy
farmed for a while and they had me. Then almost two years later they had my
brother Matt. Each time the cost of our delivery was paid for by the sale of a
cow.
Daddy
was constantly on the lookout to improve our lot and it was pretty clear that
he wouldn’t be able to buy his own farm so he went to work for the Rural
Electric Co-op as a lineman. Then to Oklahoma Gas and Electric.
Then he
bought a service station. For those of you too young to remember, that was a
place you stopped at to refuel your car. You would stay in your car while an
attendant came running out to fill your gas tank, wash your windows, check your
oil, take payment for the gas (cash or credit only – no credit cards existed
then.) He wished you a safe journey, thanked you, and invited you to come back.
They
also took care of your car’s maintenance and repair – everything from washing
and vacuuming to new windshield wiper blades to engine overhauls. These were
where they made their money, not the gasoline sales. Those were basically
come-ons to get your other business.
The
service station didn’t work out, primarily due to Oklahoma’s “gas wars.” In
today’s climate where you’re glad to get $2.50 plus gas, gas wars seem like a myth.
The stations – and like today, there was one on almost every corner – would undercut
each other on gas prices. This went so far as to get gas down to nine cents a
gallon. That was cheaper than Daddy could buy the gas.
So
he went to work for Sears, Roebuck selling household appliances. That was the
first and only time Daddy dressed in a suit for something other than church.
And from there to the City of Edmond’s Electric Department, then to Edmond’s
Water Treatment Plant, then to Edmond’s new hospital as their Executive
Housekeeper where he supervised the entire housekeeping and maintenance staff,
then to Oklahoma Christian College where he again supervised the maintenance
staff and grounds crews.
And
finally, he retired.
He
left the farm early on, but it was always with him. He gardened. He bought an
acreage and gardened on a grand scale. He raised goats for milk, chickens for
eggs and meat. He raised rabbits and two or three pigs, and a couple of cows at
a time for meat. He had bees for honey. All before retirement. And after.
In all this time, he left Oklahoma County only for vacations. With the exception
of living a short time in Payne County when he first went to work for REA. That’s
about fifty miles away, an easy car trip home each weekend.
He
added work friends and his family regularly added family friends to his circle.
Then
after caring for Momma in the last few years of her life and living on his own
in Oklahoma County, he and I joined our households. Three years ago we moved to
Lakewood, Colorado, for my husband’s job.
Lakewood,
a suburb of Denver, is more than half again as big as Edmond, the town we
called home in Oklahoma. Denver is twice as big as Oklahoma City,
population-wise. And we didn’t know anyone here. No ready-made circle of
friends.
We
have care-givers from Visiting Angels help Daddy five mornings a week now and
we go to an exercise class Mondays and Wednesdays at Carmody Recreation Center.
So when Daddy’s 90th birthday was approaching, I didn’t consider throwing a party because “who would we invite?” We didn't really have friends or relatives here.
Daddy’s
close friends and relatives who are still living, live a long way away.
But
Carol, one of Daddy’s care-givers, wanted to know what we were going to do for
Daddy’s birthday and I told her I hadn’t planned anything. Well, she said she
was going to do something anyway. And Yolanda, Daddy’s primary care-giver, said
I should have a party for him and invite the people from our exercise class.
So
that’s what we did. My husband, our daughter, her fiance, and Daddy, too. They all helped get ready for the party. Daddy and his care-giver Richard peeled and chopped apples for Daddy's famous apple pie. I baked -- cookies, the pies, a chocolate cake.
Daddy and I wondered who would come. How many would come? Would the sun shine or would it rain? Did we have enough food?
They came and we had enough food. The sun shone. The house was full and guests spilled out onto the deck. Three of his care-givers (two with
spouses in-tow) and lots of people from the exercise class came. Relatives from
all over called to wish him Happy Birthday. He had a very good time. We all
did.
And,
you know what? Daddy has a ready-made circle of friends wherever he is.
Richard from Visiting Angel, Daddy,
and Louise from Exercise Class.